#Just_Average

We took a family vacation to the midwest, driving for 3 days. It was pretty cool.

Things I've learned about the journey are

• If you've seen one city, you've seen them all - they're full of people, noise, and insane drivers.
• Freeways suck and scar all the beautiful places - there are so many beautiful spots that have been injected with an overload of people and cars.  
• Most of Nevada to Nebraska is hella ugly - I guess high desert and such is not my thang.

Anyway, it was a nice family visit.

There were a few nights we opted to sleep in our mini-van... all 5 of us. It was a challenge and took a couple attempt to get it somewhat suitable. But with the husband and eldest being mega tall beings things were difficult. I do feel somewhat encouraged that I could easily take the kids on a journey to the coach and live out of the van for a couple days.

I've been thinking about routines. I know i desperately need one but it's been increasingly difficult as time goes on. Since coming home I've felt the life be sucked out of me. On the road, even though it was exhausting both mentally and physically, things seemed simpler. The constant access sunshine or the outside world helped. At one point, we had luscious rain that energized me. =)

At any rate, I've been doing some thinking about routines and skills. I think I'm coming to terms with the fact that I truly do suck at everything. Ok, maybe not suck, but Im just so average as to be barely Good at anything. It's hard to realize these things about yourself, but perhaps it will help me move on in life. Move on where, I don't know. maybe just move on away from any pressure to want to accomplish anything "great" or "significant".

As far as routines, I was thinking of storing most of my clothes away again except for workout attire. I really need to get this extra weight off. In an effort to focus myself better, having only workout clothes around might help with that. There's also the other issue of spiritual care that I've been contemplating and so have been trying to work out a morning pattern of coffee, prayer, and incense burning. Did you know that frankincense has been found to have antidepressant properties?

Well anyway. Next stop: living at the beach in my minivan... for a couple days.