Last night was a bit of a marital crisis for me. Many people these days probably won't even bat an eyelash when I say that I found a sexual tweet by my husband to some "unknown" cosplayer who posted a picture of her ass falling out of some skimpy shorts. Seriously, these things were basically thongs.
Fistly: I was already somewhat mental. And we had just had an intimate encounter, which will usually augment any emotion I'm already feelings. Go guess what? I went ape shit.
He promises it was intended to be funny as what he tweeted was a line from a movie. I know the line, I know what the line intends, but I was still furious and insulted.
After a long while of explaining his frame of mind as he tweeted it - which, by the way didn't help to make me feel any better at all - I drove off at 11 o'clock at night, wandering here and there and eventually ending up at Walmart to do some middle of the night shopping. What else is an upset depressed person going to do in the middle of the night?
Our culture is oversexed and desensitized to so much crap these days; we don't have traditional television for this reason. Do men not see how insecure a lot of us girls - no, sorry, WOMEN - are? Especially some of us who used to have great little bodies but have since BORE THEIR CHILDREN, become a bit soft, and look a bit tired around the eyes these days? Can we compete with the young girls like that, flaunting their half naked bodies to the world? I refuse to compete with shit like that! But that doesn't mean I'm bursting at the seams with the greatest self-esteem.
One day that girl might be someone's mom. I know we all do crazy shit when we're young but we "adults" should be the ones thinking about that stuff and not contributing to stupid young-person antics. But at the moment she is someone's daughter, and in that respect I would expect someone who is already a DAD to just not bother "going there", joke or not.
I suppose one could argue that the cosplayer-girl doesn't have much security either, and I should feel sorry for her, or else why would she be showing off her body in such a way to a bunch of random people on the internet? Obviously she wants a response. Well she got it. From my husband, no less, who thought it was the coolest thing when she @replied to him. Woohoo. I hope he's happy because I'm currently feeling shitty and angry and insulted.
Even though I believe his story (now), it doesn't make me want to be all cuddly and cozy at the moment. Needless to say I slept in the living room last night and I don't even want to see him when he comes home. It's going to be weird. I love him, but I honestly don't want to be around him right now. I just want to be left alone. The sad thing is he's leaving on Sunday morning for a whirlwind trip several states away for a family event. I don't want him to leave while I'm still angry. Unfortunately I can't help how i feel, as much as I'd love to be able to have a switch for things like this. So, yeah... I don't know.
Sorry no kitty picture today...
No comments:
Post a Comment